It is wedding season here in Lebanon! It can not be a Saturday or a Sunday without hearing Beep! Beep! Beep! once or twice on both days of the week; and all those kids suddenly start jumping yelling “Aroos! aroos!” While, the bride is sitting in the fancy car waving like a role model “I want peace all over the place”, with flowers all over the car and most importantly, the bouquet pointed in the center of the hoods (right in the middle), flashy designs on the doors and “Just Married” all over the bumpers.
Lets start off with the invitation cards that one receives a month or more prior. Wedding invitation cards nowadays seem like “The more you spend money on the card, the number of people will increase.” Receiving an invitation wedding card that takes 2-5 minutes to open is torture. Other than those long poems you get to read before getting to know who’s wedding it is; do you really have to share your love with everyone and on each card you send? By the way, couples take pictures of the card, post and send it to everyone they know. So, why are you wasting your time anyways?
Not forgetting those feeble posts that couples start sharing all over the social media. I know someone who kept posting count-downs for the big day, EACH AND EVERY SINGLE day; and sending people messages every now and then making sure that they are still going to the wedding which was two months ahead.
On the other hand, doesn’t the “tradition” mention that the groom is not supposed to see the bride’s dress until the big day? Or was that in the ancient days?
The big day is here, everyone is very busy getting ready for the wedding; when suddenly the bride’s Facebook status changes “getting married to…” Seriously? Aren’t you supposed to be at the hair dresser or fixing your make up or ironing your dress or making sure everything is perfectly done.
It is unbelievable how Lebanese weddings tend to be, these days. The first wedding I ever attended was when I was eight or so; and since that time until today; every wedding I go to, I have to hear “3a2belik“, and I go all like: “No, thank you.”
Staying single and not getting married is huge sin in Lebanon or maybe upon the traditions I was raised on. A girl can not stay single “without a man in her life” because you know: he is the source of money, safety, power and he has the weapon to get kids (people do say that, by the way!) and she has to handle all the negative points in him and it is fine if he asked her to leave college to marry him; because taking care of him is much more important than learning. And, if one day; the couples decided to divorce, the blame is thrown on the girl: “Why did she marry him from the first place?” or “poor girl, she wasted her life on a man who never honored her.”
I do not understand the concept of a woman who got divorced can not get married again, especially if she had children. And, a woman who is 40 years old and above will never get married or will find her man. How do you know? Why do you take decisions upon other people’s opinions? Why do you always blame the woman for the divorce? I am not saying that women do not do mistakes but, there is no way that any problem upon any two couples is fully caused by one person but 50% by the woman and 50% by the man and we live in a society where a woman is criticized on everything. When two couples divorce, gossips start rushing around: “Remember when we were sitting at that cafe, she was wearing a very short dress. How do you expect him not to divorce her?” “She used to talk to every guy in her class at college.” “She went shopping with many friends when she was young.”
If people will break up on the length of their dresses or the people they talk to or how, why, with whom they spend time with; no one will get married, ever. By the way, you can not sit in a wedding and pinch your daughter OR your son to check out a guy/girl; or force your son to introduce himself to your daughter and brag to the girl about his engineering company he works in or how awesome his boss is or how much he earns at work. This is very annoying, embarrassing and no stranger really cares about.
As a Lebanese girl, such incidents did happen to me; I was at my friend’s wedding once and this guy suddenly shows up out of nowhere and starts talking about his Business major at AUB, (before introducing himself, I had to ask who he was, prestigious much?) where he gets his clothes and the shoes he is wearing (seriously, is this how you flirt with a girl?) and how much his BMW 2005 is costing him each month. Why would I care about all that? Isn’t this just too much information about himself? The conversation ended up by me walking away to have free food at the buffet and leaving this show-off alone to catch up with some other girl.
Lastly, the world is still rotating but we are still here. You do not have to exaggerate and show off about anything you do in life. Marriage is a process and a CHOICE as well. Forcing marriage and making a big deal out of it is too much. Stay single forever or getting married at the age of forty or whatever age is not a bad thing because love has no age.
Oh, and by the way; women do not need dicks as weapons because not all girls love to raise generations and handle babies.
“Behind every happy couple lies two people who have fought hard to overcome obstacles and interference to be that way. Why? Because its that what they wanted” -Kim George.